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gentle breast” (2) and to “lift one thought in prayer” (4). Yet between those pleas he inserts
manipulating false modesty: “A poet lies, or that which once seem’d he—” (3). Any addict
would be intimately familiar with the need for approval, for an “…atmosphere of approval and
praise is apt to be so exhilarating as to put us off balance by creating an insatiable appetite for
more of the same” (Twelve 85) as well as manipulation: “we habitually try to manipulate others
to our own willful desires” (Twelve 53). Coleridge doesn’t stop exhibiting addictive traits there.
One simply needs to look at the next two lines for more. Coleridge claims he lived a great while
“with toil of breath” (5), equating the very act of existence to hard work. Immediately after this
statement, he proclaims the result of that work as “death in life” (6). Recovering addicts would
find it easy to understand these sentiments, having been “baffled by the seeming futility of
existence, they show the underlying reasons why they were making heavy going of life”
(Alcoholics 51). With his next-to-last line, Coleridge exhibits yet another aspect of the abuse-
suffering persona. He imparts a sense of longing “to be forgiven for fame” (7). “For,” the author
tells readers, means “instead of” in this instance. A deeply infectious necessity to achieve
forgiveness, while it is out of reach due to affliction, is life blood to any addict: “...all-round
forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly
knew we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too” (Twelve 58).

Lest this correlation between addiction and Coleridge’s works seem incidental, there is
more evidence within “The Pains of Sleep.” In the beginning lines Coleridge tells of a night
when he is okay and things are well. He points out some details that, to him, are obviously
important enough to be enlisted as descriptors of such an evening. Despite not usually doing so,
this night, he has prayed with both “moving lips” and “bended knees” (3). Almost immediately
following that statement, he writes.

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